123 SESAME ST — In an early hour of the afternoon between Arthur and Bob the Builder, police descended on the Children’s Television Workshop, dispersing the protests that had occupied Sesame Street for over 42 seasons. The protestors had been railing against “the man,” who is purported to have been pulling the strings behind the scenes from the beginning.
“Conditions at OSS had become a threat to public health,” said FCC Chairman Kevin Cash during a press conference to justify the crackdown. “One individual was even found to be living inside of a trash can.”
“Furthermore, despite signs prohibiting feeding the birds, protestors had been throwing them stale cookies to the point where at least one bird got really big.” The bird feeding incident reportedly instigated a monster fight, with one impassioned protestor practically blue in the face snatching at the scattered cookies while shouting that they were still “good enough for [him].”
Attempting to arrest an accented protestor in a cape, an officer told the man he had three seconds to come quietly.
“One, two, three seconds!” scoffed the protestor, “ah ha ha ha ha!”
Before the man could be arrested, there was a crash of thunder and lightning. He and the surrounding protestors used the distraction to don identical Halloween masks, leaving the befuddled officer unable to determine which one of these fiends was not like the other.